FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
March 15, 2020
Contact: Jason Hogue, Director of Marketing Communications, 402-872-2429
Peru, Nebraska - Victims' rights advocate and creator of the viral hashtag, #WhyIStayed, Beverly Gooden
visited Peru State College as part of the campus's Distinguished Speaker Series on
March 2.
Beverly Gooden's presentation broke down the myths and misunderstandings around domestic
violence to illuminate the complex reasons why victims stay in abusive relationships
and what you can do to help. Recently the “me too” movement has shown us what our
society considers acceptable can be changed by the work of many individuals coming
together to speak with a unified voice.
Gooden spoke intently on the nature of victim blaming, and how it comes from a concept
of escapism. She said, "I hear people say all the time, it couldn't happen to me.
What happened to you would never happen to me. I would never be abused, I would never
be in an abusive relationship. I'm too strong, I would never find myself in that situation.
People say that to me all the time, to my face... It's a belief, they really truly
believe it cannot happen to me."
Another component to victim blaming was the idea of a "just world." She said, "If
something bad happened to you, you brought it on yourself, you did something to deserve
it. You wore something to invite it. It's that line of thinking that bad things don't
happen to good people, and a lot of people actually believe that. We know that the
world is not always just. I believe we can make the world just."
Gooden expressed her belief that it was integral to change the discussion from victim
blaming to revolving around supporting victims of domestic violence and helping them
escape their abusive circumstances.
Known for creating the viral Twitter hashtag #WhyIStayed in the wake of several high-profile
domestic violence incidents, Beverly sparked a national conversation about how society
views victims, while calling for a community response to this important social issue.
Drawing on her own gripping tale of overcoming an abusive relationship, Beverly provides
you with a personal account of how it feels to live in fear and why it’s so difficult
for individuals to leave those who exert physical and emotional control over them.
On stage, Beverly lays the groundwork for critical conversation about the dynamics
of abusive relationships, while revealing ways that you can help, including the important
questions to ask those who you suspect are being abused. With unguarded honesty and
palpable passion for changing lives for the better, she empowers audiences to expose
their own stories and discover their role in ending domestic violence.
Why I Stayed: The Complexity of Domestic Violence
"Why I Stayed" is a revolutionary speech by Beverly Gooden, renown social activist
and creator of the #WhyIStayed hashtag and global movement. In this radical talk,
Gooden challenges the question “Why did he/she stay?” and reveals how the current way we interact with survivors is a house of cards. From
faulty blame attribution, to designating only men as abusers, it’s easy to overlook
the sheer volume of domestic violence when the issue has historically been framed
as “them” and not “us”.
That’s why, as Beverly argues, domestic violence is a community issue. Victims of
violence can be women and men, LGBTQ and heterosexual, or even children. Victims of
violence may have fought back, or remained silent. There is no perfect victim and
no specific type of abuser. Beverly discusses her personal domestic violence story,
reveals the most important questions to ask victims, and outlines how we all can help.
About the Distinguished Speaker Series
Peru State established the Distinguished Speaker Series in 2010 as part of a commitment
to student engagement and success. The intent of the Series is to bring diverse, nationally
and internationally recognized speakers to southeast Nebraska to enrich the educational
experience of students while also providing regional communities more opportunities
to engage in interesting and relevant topics.
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Quentin Victor contributed to this release