Peru, Nebraska – The Peru State College sign at the intersection of U.S. Highway 75 and the 67 Spur is again lit at night. The sign had not been lit due to a major internal redesign.
An embarrassed driver admits, “Without the sign, I would just get in the zone, listening to Hamilton and keep driving until I hit Mexico. It made for some long nights.”
Evidently other drivers would drive from Nebraska City, along 75, miss the Peru turn, and continue to Auburn. When they got to the wrong town they would turn around and make the same mistake the other direction until the sun came up or they had to pull over and sleep.
Law enforcement reports that the number of drivers camping on the side of the road between Auburn and Nebraska City has dropped off completely. Some officers would collect caravans and lead them in to town when possible.
In related news, the bright new sign has attracted some fantastic guests. Riders of the Mark were on campus early Saturday morning as they mistook the sign as a signal fire of Gondor.
Éomer Éadig, Lord of the Mark, King of Rohan, said, “You see, we have a treaty with Gondor and they can summon aid by lighting a large bonfire if orcs cross the Anduin. . .”
Éadig paused before continuing, “Look, it’s a long story. I’m going to take the Éoherë to get breakfast pizza now.”
This release is satire.